The (1111ft) is the tallest building in that country. #educate
Group I – 3 pm
Norway 1 (502ft) v. France 4 (793ft) – who cares, Norway played their subs, Mbappe couldn’t even score, Dembele got a hat trick*
Senegal 5 (250ft) v. Iraq 0 (591ft) – Woof Woof Iraq, what a way to end the world cup: goal, red card early and then 4 more goals, Tunisia’s -10 goal difference was one of the worst in the world cup ever, Iraq ended with -11. YIKES.**
Bottom Line: 1) France; 2) Norway; 3) Senegal
Group H – 8 pm
Cabo Verde 0 (153ft) v. Saudi Arabia 0 (1,972ft tallest clock tower in the world) – I may hate all the things that got Cabo Verde into this world cup, but it is awesome that they have gotten through as the 2nd place team in Group H (not even this crunch can hate on that). Some people are mad that they managed to do this by tying three games in a row and by “parking the bus”, but those people stink. Literally, those people have poops in their pants. First, they did not park the bus against the Saudis or Uruguay. Second, even if they did park the bus for all three games, it would be impressive to have the discipline/skill/team unity to manage to do that. So good job to them for getting through. All that said, this all is the worst because FIFA is going to use them as why it is such a good reason to have 48 teams. It is not a good reason.
Uruguay 0 (517ft) v. Spain 1 (817ft) – Embarrassing for Uruguay. Not just that they did not get a win and they didn’t advance from a group that had Cape Verde (no offense) and Saudi Arabia, but also how they ended the game like little bitches against Spain. First, a straight red for an egregious high studded tackle and then that same player tries to fight the ref.
Insane. Second, Uruguay are in a bad spot. Their coach seemed to actively try and make them worse and their team was a mess. But at least they have 2 to 4 world cup-type wins from the early-mid 1900s. Oh and they recently had a guy– Luis Suarez–who bit everyone (while playing soccer)
Listen to this baby! (ie the coach)
Bottom Line: 1) Spain; 2) Cabo Verde
Group G – 11 pm – I can’t deal with these games starting so late.
New Zealand 1 (614ft tallest in Polynesia) v. Belgium 5 (490ft) – Belgium are the worst. They are the least smelly of the group of turds. Whatever
Egypt 1 (1292ft tallest in Africa) v. Iran 1 (591ft) – a point for Egypt could = group leader
Pre-game controversy, both teams were on the verge of protesting/not playing if any LGBTQ+ imagery/rainbow flags were part of the game because for some reason FIFA decided that this team was going to be a “pride” game. Just another completely unhinged decision from FIFA*****
As for the game, both teams scored one goal. So they tied. That’s all I got.
Bottom Line: 1) Belgium; 2) Egypt; 3) Iran
Today we flush the following teams goodbye: (btw you should be playing the video once for each team that we flush. think of it like the cannon that goes off in Hunger Games when a person is killed)
Tomorrow’s Games
Group L – 5 pm – if Panama wins, then not sure who gets through
Panama v. England
Croatia v. Ghana
Group K – 7:30 pm
Colombia v Portugal – who cares
DR Congo v. Uzbekistan – if Congo wins then probably goes through
Group J – 10 pm
Algeria v. Austria – Winner gets second place, loser will probably still go through
Jordon v Argentina – Argentina will sit players, Jordon out
*Golden boat race: Messi 5 (plays tomorrow?); Mbappe 4; Dembele 4; Haaland 4. (CR7 has only 2 goals – hahahahaha)**
**On that note (bad teams) this tournament also has -8 goal differences from Qatar and Curacao, Uzbekistan is already on -7 with one more game to play, and Haiti is at -6. For reference in 2022-Qatar there was one team with -8 and one at -6 (Qatar); in 2018-Russia there was one team at -9 and one at -4; in 2014-Brazil one team at -8 and one at -7; in 2010-S. Africa one team at -11 (N. Korea); in 2006-Germany one team at -8 and one at -6; 2002-S.Korea/Japan one team at 12 (Saudi Arabia-this may be the worst all time) and one at -9 (China). (I could go further but im not looking at stats from the another century, that would be crazy.) All that is to say, in every other tournament there sometimes is one or two bad teams, this tournament has at least 6 terrible teams, and then more just not good teams. Maybe we should not have expanded the tournament from 32 to 48. Eh?
***One other thing about the tournament expansion. All sort of records are going to be broken and it is going to kinda suck a big butt. With so many bad teams, we will have so many more lopsided games and so great players will be able to feast. It is not necessarily a reason to not do something just because it;po0- will affect records. But it is worth saying out loud that the change will end up doing that. But also we just should not have an expanded tournament.
****We have too many games and too many games that don’t matter. One of the beauties of the World Cup is how many important games there are (from group play to the finals), now we too many games in the group play, we have too many games that don’t matter in the group play, and I will bet my old bottom dollar that the first round of knockouts will also have games that will be terrible/lop sided. But who cares. At least people are making more money.
*****This is a good excuse as any for this video of FIFA’s president Giani Infantino who may be the worst person in the world who is not a world or corporate leader. The video is from just before the Qatar world cup, and was his response to criticism of Qatar’s human rights abuses:
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